The Joe Derive Show

Hey everyone and welcome to the new Joe Derive show. That's right, I'm on radio and that means I get to have guests talk to me live and what better guest to start the season that good old Julio Lugo. Hey Julio.

"Hey Joe. Great to be here. Glad I have a lot of time now to do such things."

"Right, you're a free agent and...sorry about that. "

"No worries, no worries, I still got my radio show. The only locally produced show in the Detroit area at the 3:00 am hour is something to be proud of and I have a restaurant too!"

"Really, that's great. Where is it. "

"In Colorado. One block from Arnie's. He's a blogger on the Red Sox blog. I opened it up to honor Mike Lowell. The restaurant was called the Flame Thrower. "

"Was called?"

"Well, that's a long story."

"You know Julio, I can't quite get the connection between a flame thrower and a restaurant. "

"Quick heating of food ya know. I mean, I use an actual flame thrower to get the food cooked quick. It was my idea you know. I used it first on the surprise party of Mike Lowell. It worked out great. "

"Oh ya, how's Mike liked it. "

"Oh ya know, we had a problem but ya know, skin grafts and all have come a long way so he should be fine. "

"Wait, did you set Mike Lowell on fire?"

"Actually the better, more accurate response would be that Mike and my restaurant may have caught a flame or two but both can be rebuilt...some...ah..easier than others but ya know, Mike dropped the lawsuit...so maybe Arnie can to."

"Wait, why is Arnie suing you."

"Hey, it's not Lugo's fault that the fire spread OK. I never used a flame thrower before and just to note...flame throwers cannot put out fires so let everyone know that. Believe me I tried. "

"I have to take a breath for a second Lugo so hold on. OK...now what do you think of the Red Sox this year?"

"Well, of course the glory days are over when I won the World Series for them in 1782 or whenever it was but ya, know, it's OK. I mean I think Toto Francona is gonna do a great job. "

"Tito."

"Toto right?"

"No, he's not the Lone Ranger's sidekick. It's Tito."

"Oh, Tito...no wonder Toto he always gave me a dirty look. Man am I dumb."

"It's Tito, and ya well, let's no go there, and thank you for being on the Joe Derive show. Wish you well."

"Ya well, I'm considering a ton of offers. I just have to decide which ones. Let me tell ya about a few of them like..."

"Well, good luck with that. Sorry to cut you off but gotta go."

OK that's it for the Joe Derive show. See you next time.