Winter Meetings

Hi, I'm Joe Derive and this is the winter meetings. If you think things are looking up for the Sox, think again. I sat down with Ben Cherington trying to understand 'the plan.'

"We are sticking with the plan and that means a plan that we put into effect. Many people wonder about the plan and I have made it clear that the plan is the plan and we plan on using the plan."

"Can you give my viewers any details of the plan because I have no idea what you just said?"

"Ah...no."

"So in other words, you don't have a plan."

"Of course I do Mr. Derive. You and your readers should know that we have the plan...you know like the Joker in Dark Knight...the plan...where he was doing things...that were...part of the plan."

"The Joker was insane..."

"Crap...OK we don't have a plan and I'm not insane...I think."

OK after that I had to walk away before I was getting Ben's infection of insanity. Now later I sat down with Theo Epstein who talked about Ben Cherington.

"Ben and I joked that I raided the Red Sox offices to look for secrets but ya know I was joking because I mean...I don't have a plan or anything besides spending money on useless free agents and...you're not quoting me are you Joe?"

I had to walk away from that one as well. I decided to hit up on John Farrell and talk to him. Here is what he said on the Red Sox collapse.

[no quote]

OK as you may have guessed he said nothing.

Now onto fan mail. Many of you have asked what I think of Daniel Bard becoming a starter. I say first you unload Papelbon and then you use Bard to become a starter and I say I guess its part of the plan to think stupid but that's me. So far the Sox are missing two starters, are going to use Bard (second best closer on the team) and Alfredo (best relief man in the pen) to start and have cleaned out the bullpen in the process leaving no starter and no long term relief...but then again we have Bobby Jenks who can't stay healthy for a day mainly because he's overweight and out of shape. Wow, talk about a drinking binge waiting to happen!

I'm Joe Derive...