Bursted Balloon

The home run that struck the outfield gave fans more than a baseball to take home with them, it was also the moment that the fans could also bear a sense of purpose again -- the Sox had done a walk off homerun.  The Sox had won a hard fought game against the Rays and now a huge celebration took place in the clubhouse.  Jarad Saltalamachia, Salty to this Red Sox crowd, fought against a lot of skeptics and showed everyone he's worth keeping around.  He hit that homerun and stitches and all he was one tough fella.

"We did it, "shouted everyone in a random set of dancing, jumping around and high-fives that made the clubhouse, a once somber setting into a World Series celebration.  Jarad was soaking it all in.

"We are the Sox, " shouted David Ortiz and everyone joined in with a big yes.  They once again began hugging and cheering and shouting.

"I'm pitching tomorrow and I'm gonna win it, "said Clay Buckhotz and soon the entire room went silent.  Even the crickets, in the state of Maine could be heard.  Grim faces filled the room and all pointed to Clay with the highest ERA in the league. 

"Watch me win! " shouted Clay as his rubbery arms now drooped as a wilted plant and with that Salty grabbed Clay and pulled him aside as everyone suddenly was hitting the showers and heading home.  Salty sat Clay down and rubbed his temple with his sweat. 

"Clay...what have I taught you about your mouth."

"Ah, "said Clay. "Eat with your mouth, breath with your mouth and if you got something to say with your mouth, write it down...ah...instead and burn it."

"No, not burn it...we talked about that since the last fire in Yankee stadium..."

"Oh ya, " said Clay.  "crumble it up and put it in my pocket."

"Exactly, "snapped Salty but it was already too late as Clay, dropped his head down as tears welted from his eyes dripping down on the floor like raindrops.

"Clay, listen to me...we all love you here.  Everyone thinks you're...awesome and all.  "

Salty just watched Clay degenerate and decay in front of his eyes.

"How ya coming with your times tables?"

Clay smiled again and wiped the tears from his eyes and said, "seven times seven is forty eight...seven times eight is 50 and..."

"Clay, Clay, Clay, " said Salty wiping his beard and pulling on his hairs before he smiled again. "Ya...that's great Clay.  You're gonna be fine."

"It's such a mental strain to think Salty.  I didn't think it would be so hard to think but it is. "

"I know Clay, I know, "said Salty with a reassuring smile.  "Everyone has to do it though."

"Not with Victor Martinez  I just follow his instructionalizms and he tell me what to do but I don't do that with you.  Why Salt and Pepper?'

Salty forced a gritty smile and said, "My name is not Salt and Pepper.  You can't give guys nicknames.  Remember the nickname you gave Josh Beckett"

"Ole blubberbutt...I meant it as a compliment."

"And what did Josh do to let you know his feelings?"

"Ah, "said Clay who appeared to have smoke rising in his head. "He hung me from a flagpole by my underwear and hoped I didn't reproduce."

"Ya...that should tell you something now shouldn't it?"

"Ah, "said Clay.  "I thought the Stork brought the baby to the cabbage patch.  I mean, Salty, I can't exactly decided if I aim to reproduce it not or."

"OK Clay, " said Salty,  "We're kind of at our brain explosion point so why don't we write it down then throw it away OK."

Clay nodded.  He appeared to be confused but then smiled.

"Salty..."

Salty shook his head and handed Clay a piece of paper.  Clay wrote down his thoughts and handed them back to Salty.

"OK Clay, 'we've talked about this.  Watching Sesame Street is a bit above your thinking level.  Let's stick to Teletubbies."

Clay wrote down some more and handed it to Salty.  Salty gave a huge sigh of frustration but then smiled through it.

"OK, of course I'll watch it with you."

The two strolled off as Salty heard in his head how it would feel to have a sledgehammer strike your stomach.  Teletubbies felt almost as painful.