Gomes Wants to SMASH Things

Hi, I'm Joe Derive

Today the Boston Red Sox signed Gomes adding that this will really make a difference for the future.  Gomes may be best remembered for punching Coco Crisp in the back.  Hey...we got this guy????????

Gomes: 'I just like to go out and punch people.  I talked to Ben 'Maxwell Smart' Cherington and he said that my OPS and my 'journeyman' qualifications should provide enough offense to compensate for my failures as a human being.

Joe Derive: So how did you react to that?

Gomes: I just punched him in the back. It was all friendly and all.  I mean I didn't mean to have him in the hospital but hey...that's me.

Joe Derive: You punched him in the back?

Gomes: Hey anybody who talks to me like that gets hit like a man...in the back!

Joe: Do you even know why he said???

Gomes: Not really.  What's an OPS?

Joe: You are a perfect candidate for the Bobby Jenks show.

Gomes: Ya they already called me.  I'm gonna work with John Lackey and we're calling ourselves the 'TRIPLE FIST'

Joe: Seems to me you're the 'SOLO FIST'

Gomes: Hey I like that.  Man just makes me want to hit the wall.

Gomes: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Joe: Well on that note I think we can end this interview.

Gomes: Now I have to hit the car window!

Joe: Hey stop it man OK. 

Gomes: You're making me ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joe:I'm Joe Derive.  Have a happy thanksgiving...away from this NUTCASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!