Bobby V crashes bike

Hi, I'm Joe Derive.


In NYC, Bobby Valentine crashed his bike while reading a text message from Dustin Pedroia.  Bobby had this to say:

"I think it was OK to read a text message while trying to avoid crashing into people as long as you have your helmet on.  Gee, I wonder why the Darwin awards called me the other day.  I read that while driving before I crashed into a telephone poll."

This is already Bobby's 59th injury since joining the team.   Here are his most famous:

In Baltimore, Bobby Valentine was injured while sharpening his knife.

"I think it was OK to aim the knife towards my body while rubbing it on the sharpening stone.  It wasn't my fault I drove it into my finger so easily. "

In LA Bobby Valentine was injured while running his belt sander sanding a piece of wood.

"I like sanding wood and I was wearing a very loose sweater.  It's not my fault the sweater got caught on the belt and got sucked right into the machine.  Fortunately I wasn't hurt too bad. "

In Boston, Bobby Valentine was injured while chopping some wood.  

"I aimed the axe at my leg to give me a target but I really was aiming for the wood.  It was a smart thing to do despite the emergency room visit from a semi-amputated leg.  Darwin awards keep calling me. "

In Seattle, Bobby was helping a friend get rid of spiderwebs.  Using a propane torch it made it very easy for Bobby to burn the webs.  Sadly he burned some near the gas heater.  Fire extinguishers are a good thing apparently.

"I forgot that propane burns and I guess that wasn't too smart but it was so effective.  I won't do that again.  Hold on I have a call from the Darwin awards." 


I'm Joe Derive