BEN: I have to warn you John that in this organization, silence is the key.
JOHN: O...K...but nobody is in this room.
Ben scanned the room. His eyes were everywhere.
BEN: OK...I'm satisified that we can lower the RAINING...CONE OF SILENCE!
JOHN: Why is it...what?
BEN: Think nothing of it Ben. I'm in CHARGE.
John rolls his eyes. The Raining Cone Of Silence lowers.
BEN: Are we ready!
JOHN: It's RAINING...I'm getting soaked!
BEN: Of course it is. The RAINING Cone of Silence is just that. This way when it rains the drowning rain will hide our voices.
JOHN: For heaven's Sake you idiot. You just ruined my IPHONE!
BEN: Well why didn't you add the CONTROL Waterproof covering.
JOHN: Get me out of this thing before I KILL YOU.
BEN:Oh, in that case I will.
The CONE OF SILENCE raises leaving two waterlogged bodies starring at each other.
BEN:John, I sense a little hostility here.
JOHN: To THINK...I gave up the Blue Jays job for a total IDIOT!
BEN: I am not a TOTAL idiot John. Remember Daniel Bard!
John rolls his eyes thinking of how Bard was ruined by Ben's choices.
BEN:OK would you believe I'm going to resign David Ortiz, injury and all, to a five year contract! Would you believe it!
JOHN: YES!
BEN [confused]: You're supposed to say I find that hard to believe!
JOHN: NOT WITH YOU IT ISN'T!
BEN:Let's get down to business. I have here the outline for pitching coach, bench coach, etc. I have also laid out the team and your role. I just want you to know you're in charge of management!
JOHN: So I can't pick my own coaches?
BEN: Ah...no.
JOHN: I can't pick any of the players?
BEN:Of course not. That's my job.
JOHN: I have to call you as you'll be managing the game!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BEN:Yes.
JOHN:Then what can I do?
BEN:The most important part -- press conferences where you tell everyone you're in charge. Boy are you an idiot!
JOHN:Ben you talk and act like Maxwell Smart!
BEN: I am NOT SMART!
JOHN: Well we all know that.
BEN:Anyway, remember you are in complete control...of nothing but don't tell them that. They may think I'm in charge and even though I am in charge. we can't let anyone know that I'm in charge so you're in charge...even though you don't actually do anything but manage press conferences...got it.
John grabbed an aspirin but discovered it was soaked in his pocket. He throws it away.
BEN: Believe me John...with me in charge you'll see a Red Sox team like you can't even imagine!
JOHN: I KNOW!
BEN: Come on John, don't take it hard. With Daniel Bard our number one starter, John Lester in the bullpen, David Ortiz catching and Cody Ross pitching we're sure to shock the baseball world.
JOHN: I am NOT worried about that Ben for sure!
BEN: Good then we can call it a day...unless you have any questions that you can't ask of course since you're not in charge.
JOHN:No #$#$#$.
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