John Henry, drained and beaten, after a long day at work, plodded into his house and crashed on the couch. He only moved when he saw the strange fury creature stroll past him.
"Honey, is that a cat?"
"A gift from Tito John. Wasn't that nice? After all he does consider us family. Isn't she sweet? Look at that gorgeous gray hair. "
"Yes, "said John who watched as the cat scampered away as he reached to pet her.
"Tito said,
Dear John. After all you did for me, this is the least I can do for you. Ten minutes with this cat will change you forever. Love Tito"
John got up and tried to follow the cat sat at the door.
MEOWWWWWWWWWW
John almost fell to the floor. His ears rang with pain. "Oh s-t, "cried John. "That is the worst whine I've ever heard in a cat. I think I'm gonna be sick."
MEOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
"John, relax...I think it just wants to go out. Open the door."
John reacted and pushed the door open against the cold New England night and watched as the cat run out.
Kitty ran out.
"John, that whine...I never heard something so revolting. "
John rubbed his ears trying to get feeling back in them.
"Agony dear. Just agony."
"MEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW"
"John I think the cat wants to come back in."
"Don't let him. He'll just whine again!"
"MEWWWWWWWWWWWW...MEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW"
"John open the door while we have time!"
John opened the door and felt the blast of New England Air blow past him. He watched the cat run past him.
Kitty ran in.
"MMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
"John he wants to go out the front door now. Hurry..."
John ran frantically to the front door crashing into walls and smashing a lamp.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
He ran to the door.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
He ripped the door open.
Kitty went out.
"John, I can't bear that cat. No matter how beautiful it looks...beer, let's get him beer."
"We can't. If the press catches me with beer they'll tear me in two."
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
"John, he can't possibly want to come in again. He's only been out a minute. "
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in
The cat ran past him and to the back door.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
"Oh my goodness John. All it does is go in and out."
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
"Out...have to let him out, "cried John.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went out
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went out
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went out.
Hour after hour this continued with endless whining. Later that night as the family rested in bed, John was red eyed and blurry with confusion. His wife sat next to him meowing lightly. The clock was 2:32 am.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in (2:33 am)
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went out (2:40 am)
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in (2:45 am)
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in (3:00 am)
"John we have to do something...while my mind can function."
"Yes, kill the cat!"
"John no...the press. Think of the press. "
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in (3:o5 am)
...
The next morning John picked up the phone. He could barely talk.
"John Tito here...how's that cat working out for you?"
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went in.
John hung up the phone.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty went out. John collapsed on the floor.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
John crawled to the door. He smashed it and let the air blow in. The cat stood there and whined. John grabbed the cat and pushed it outside. Now the cat whined continuously as it went in and out the door.
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
Kitty go in, Kitty go out, Kitty go in. Kitty go out. Kitty go in. Kitty go out.
It was only then that John collapsed and fell asleep.
TWO DAYS LATER
John Lackey rested on his couch and drank a beer while chowing on fried chicken.
"Honey look. A gift from John Henry...a cat."
John smiled and said, "well, I guess John Henry loves me after all.'
"MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW"
THE END
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