Tito's dream

Tito's night of restlessness ended in a hotel room as he starred at the wall. The room was empty and quiet with only the hum of the heater in the background. Tito felt the large hole in his stomach grow larger as the clock ticked on. He rested against the pillow and drifted off to sleep.

...

Tito rolled around and felt the grass rub against his body. The grass stains were all over his shirt. The sun was bright in his eyes and he heard the jostling of a man on a boat in the background cursing away.

"You coming or what?"

Tito rubbed his eyes until he clearly saw the figure on the boat dressed in a light t-shirt and jeans gathering up the ropes that held the boat to the shoreline. Tito got up and walked closer to the boat watching the man wave him onward.

"I ain't got all day. Gee, don't you fired managers get it. I ain't got all day!"

Tito rolled his eyes and stepped on the boat. He felt slightly disjointed from the small waves that rocked the boat. The smell of salt water covered his nose. He rubbed his eyes and sat down starring at the fishing equipment.

"You can't catch fish at 3:00 in the afternoon you know. Man didn't they teach you anything in life!"

Tito rubbed his forehead and adjusted himself. He watched the man start the engine and drive the boat into the blue open water. The sea stretched in all directions with a glowing sun in the background. It made the colors of the water sparkle like diamonds. He smelled the spray of salt as the water struck his face on occasion. Tito wondered where it was going. The event felt like a parallel to his own life.

"You don't say much do you."

Tito shook his head tapping his fingers on the rim of the boat. The spray continued but he didn't feel nausea like he normally does on a boat.

"Not everyone gets to fish with me you know. I'm particular and I don't put up with losers."

Tito turned towards the man.

"After all this time you spend eternity fishing and you're still complaining!"

"That's just who I am Tito. Accept it or I throw you off the boat. Want some butter baked bread?"

"You sound like a bread commercial!" said Tito well aware of this man's history. Somehow he looked larger than life at this moment, a strong figure not reflective of his last days on earth. He was young and vibrant and energetic.

"Just trying to be generous. Nothing I can stand is a rude host. Now stop tapping the bow of the boat. It's annoying."

Tito moved his hands toward himself as the boat came to a stop. The water was so calm it looked like a blanket. The warm air blew past Tito's face. He felt his blood pressure go down about 14 points.

"You looked tired Tito. Sure you don't want some New England bread?"
"No."
"Beer?"
"No."
"Whiskey?"
"No."
"Well is there anything I can offer you because I'm damn tired of being so kind and generous when you're not responding!"

Tito chuckled and leaned back. He let the sun cover his eyes.

"Just let me relax OK."

"How can you relax, "said the man who threw his fishing line in the water. "Damn Red Sox and damn organization fired such a great man before his time. "

Tito leaned his head forward and watched the sun shine off of the man's body.

"Is that a compliment."

"I just know how you feel, "said the man raising his voice and waving his hands in front of him.

"When you're doing great, oh they love you but when you screw up they hate you. I won't tip my hat to anyone like that and I stand behind that decision."

"Right, "said Tito finally chewing on some of the bread. The sweetness of the bread calmed him down as he munched on its soft textures.

"Personally, you got railroaded. John Henry and everyone else. Nope, I say to heck with them. You move on and stand tall with your chin in the air. "

"Trying you know."

The man sat down and leaned in.

"Baseball today...it's not back then. Back then you earned your pay. Today you get paid these bloated salaries and you sit around and think you're so great. No, the Sox ain't the Red Sox of old. That was baseball. Today its money and statistics and profits and cash flow. Greed. Not like back then. "

Tito nodded and felt an agreement but also knew that his salary would make him comfortable for life. That was nothing to complain about at all.

"You know Tito, I respect you. You're too soft and too squishy for me. I'll tell ya that but I respect you. I'll miss watching the games...not that I do it often mind you. I'd rather spend my eternity fishing. That's just me. "

The man leaned back and sighed and starred at the sun.

"This is so much better than being alive. You have no aches, no tears, no pains and no complaints. I like it and I like the fishing. "

Tito refused to make eye contact and turned his head towards the open sea.

"It hurts to be fired Tito. It never gets easy. It will never be easy but just know that that is life which is why I'm damn happy to be through with it. Up here in heaven, you're treated with respect and dignity and are loved at all times. I gotta tell ya its made me a damn humble and gentle man. I'm not like the ballplayer that refused to tip his hat to the crowd at Fenway. Today, I'd even consider doing it. That's how much I've changed. "

Tito watched no reaction from the man but found a smile in himself and let it out. He found it funny and watched the befuddled legend look at him confused.

"You know Ted, I gotta tell ya, I really still want to be in Boston. As hard as it was, I miss it. I will always miss it."

"No ya won't. Once you start with another club and get going you'll forget all about Boston. Sure the fans will cheer ya once you step into that stadium but otherwise you'll have moved on. Come on and stop feeling sorry for yourself. You're loved and you brought the Red Sox two World Series -- and they still fired you. "

Tito laughed and grabbed more bread before grabbing a bear and tasting the warm sweet taste of the drink.

"Now that's more like it. See, ya moved on and human memory is a great thing. Once you do something new the pain goes away. "

Tito watched Ted pull in the line and then stretch in the sun.

"OK, time to head back. I got other things to do besides fishing ya know. For one thing, I need a nap."

"Well Mr. Williams, thank you for the time. I do feel a lot better."

Ted smiled for the first time and got the engine started.

"That's what I'm here for. Call me a baseball angel and a damn nice one at that."

Tito watched the boat drift towards land and felt sleep overcome him. He rested against the bow of the boat and listened to the sounds of the day before resting for the night.

THE END or a new beginning

In Memory of Terry Francona the manager.