Law and Order meets Boston

My wife and I have become big fans of Law and Order, S.V.U. One of the characters played by B.D. Wong is a psychologist who also works for the F.B.I. It's a totally absurd idea that is ripe for satire so Tracy...this is for you.

The Red Sox were playing in New York with Dustin Pedroia saw the room next to his become a horrific murder scene. Fortunately the Special Victim's Unit was on the job.

"Detective Munch, what do we have here?"
"Captain, the body was found by Dustin Pedroia, a Red Sox superstar. We have a woman in her 30's with multiple stab wounds. Problem is we have a low grade atomic weapon next to her. I've got a call to the bomb squad but they say we're looking at least one hour..."
"Don't bother, doesn't our psychologist Wong have a PH.D. in Physics."
"Damn, I forgot that. "
(LATER...Dr. Wong enters...)
"No question, it's a low grade fission bomb. I've had to learn about these for my graduate thesis but you people have another problem."
"What's that, "asked the captain.
"These fossils. The killer obviously has a hobby in paleontology and we need to identify them and that may help us find the killer."
Munch interjected and said, "you have a doctrine in Paleontology from Stanford right?"
"Well, I can identify them but stuff like this walks into F.B.I. territory."
"Well, aren't you F.B.I. Wong?"
"Oh, ya, I forgot. OK, I'll get right on it!"
(Later...)
"OK, I got the FBI data back. Looks like a group of serial killer scientists. The cult originated in..."
"Let me guess, " snapped Munch. "Cleveland right?"
"Unfortunately yes but it gets worse!"
"How so?"
"Well, the murder was done with too much precision. It looks like a kidney specialist might have been involved based on the damage to the kidneys."
"Well, you're a kidney surgeon Wong, have you narrowed it down?"
"Oh I got the killer. He made one mistake which was to forget that NYPD has a trained psychologist, paleontologist, anthropologist, kidney specialist, physicist and chemist along with an FBI agent all in one person."
"What is this TV?" snapped the captain.

"So, Dr. Wong, you identified the bomb as a low grade fission device, is that correct!"
"Yes, I checked the F.B.I. database and found the connection with the paleontologist, who, as I found out, specialized in the Eocene era which of course is post Mezozoic. He was very interesteed in the creodont species..."
"Objection, this is a psychologist, not a paleontologist."
"Your honor, let me present into evidence Dr. Wong, Paleontologist with a specialty in the Paleocene era."
The judge looks at the credentials.
"Looks good to me."
"Dr. Wong, you also found evidence of various chemical weapons on site!"
"Yes..."
"Objection, he is not a chemist."
"Your honor, let me present to you the credentials of Dr. Wong from Standard who has a Ph.d in chemistry."
Dr. Wong continued.
"Yes various chemical weapons which I analyzed in the lab. Mainly nerve agents."
"Dr. Wong, you also found what were the remains of human fossils."
"Objection, Dr. Wong is not an anthropologist."
"Your honor, let me present to you with Dr. Wong who has his PH.D in Antropology from UCLA."
Dr Wong continued.
"We found several species of man including the famed Lucy. Whomever this was, certainly knew his science but what concerned me most was the DNA testing equipment from..."
"Objection, there is no way in hell he can have a degree in life sciences."
"Your honor, let me present to you Dr. Wong's degree in microbiology from Stanfard."
The judge looked at Dr. Wong.
"How many degrees do you have?"
"I have twenty seven doctrines, speak fifteen languages and can communicate with the dead sir. I have a condition that forces me to be awake at all times of the day. That with my photographic memory and 3600 IQ means provides the means to generate such a schedule."
The judge turned towards the court.
"What is this...TV?" snapped the judge.