Theo concerned about team overperformance.

Theo Epstein likes to think he can build a team to his standards. His goal is to create a "bunch of idiots". From our interview, I'd say he's done it.

"That's how we won the 2004 World Series but having a bunch of idiots on the team. I like to think I'm the head idiot of that idea. "

Only Theo could admit he's an idiot with pride. Theo also said that the Sox are overperforming.

"When we dumped Justin Masterson, I knew that was key to crippling the team. I've tried over and over again to do that to create a winning team. Gagne was our biggest find. It was his pitching that got us the World Series. "

Gagne was a guy you brought in when you had an eleven run lead. Wow, this is humiliating. Still Theo thinks the Sox are really frustrating to watch.

"McDonald really became a superstar which is why I'm glad we're dumping him. With Cameron back and dumping the hot fielding Jacobe to left field, we can expect the Red Sox to have an abysmal outfield. I'm proud of what I've done to help this team out."

Theo credits the bullpen for his crowning achievement.

"Ramirez, Delcarman, Oki, Bard, less so, and Papelbon have all contributed to the worst bullpen for the Red Sox in a while and I'm really proud of that. I really do wish we had Gagne back but if the bullpen starts to look good, we'll dump the player. Bard shows signs of being traded but he can still lose a game. I'm glad for that."

The warped mentality of the Red Sox general manager has everyone stumped.

"David Ortiz helped us a lot in March and April but right now he's hitting too well. We'll have to dump him soon. I want a .150 hitter and I'm really good at finding them. Look at Lugo! He was my proudest achievement. I hated to see him go but I was so glad we dumped our last shortstop. He was terrific the way he hit and fielded. Scutaro is so much better and making us look like a bunch of idiots and Beltre is just fantastic. That's what I'm talking about. Let us not forget J.D. Drew. That overpaid, injury prone player is just what I'm talking about. Sure we could have a competent player but how can you have a bunch of idiots doing that!"

You have to wonder what comes next.

"Clay is going. That's a guarantee. We'll trade him but Lackey will get an extension. If he keeps pitching like crap he's our man. Dice-K will also get an extension. We like signing players that nobody wants. I just can't understand why other managers don't think like I do."

Here's a reason Theo, they actually want to win a game!

I'm Joe Derive.