Bobby Jenks Show!!!!

HI EVERYONE.  Welcome to the Bobby Jenks show where we talk and chill out and enjoy some great beer.  Now, my first guest needs no introduction.  He's a beer drinker and a rabble rouser.  Please welcome JOHN LACKEY

(John walks on stage with two beers in hand).

Bobby and John together:
DOUBLE FIST

(Both sit down.  Bobby squirms in his seat trying to fit into it.)

John:
You should stay off the beer man...do the VOLKA!

Bobby and John together:
DOUBLE FIST

Bobby:
OK now.  What's happening with you?

John:
Just guzzling.  You know with the Red Sox you get paid to get #$#$#$.

Bobby and John together:
DOUBLE FIST

John:
I love the Sox.  The more money you make...

Bobby:
The less you do!

Bobby and John together:
DOUBLE FIST

(BObby then removes his shirt and leans back,)

Bobby:
OK, our next guest needs no introduction.  He's our own JOSH BECKETT

Bobby and John together:
DOUBLE FIST

(Josh wobbles on stage before crashing to the seat.  He looks smashed.

Bobby:
How are you Josh?

John:
Oh man.  I HATE the Dodgers. I have to actually WORK on that #$#$ team and the press is just as #$#$ bad.  #$#$.  I hate the #$#$ Dodgers. 

Bobby:
Should have stayed with the Sox and got some injury.  Heck look at Dice-K.  That man stinks when he's healthy but if he's hurt...

Josh:
I got ya. What ya really mean is...

Bobby and John and Josh together:
DOUBLE FIST

Bobby:
OK our next guest needs some serious introduction.  He's the Red Sox ever loving manager Bobby Valentine. (burp)

Bobby and John and Josh together:
DOUBLE FIST

(Bobby V. walks on stage and sits in the seat.

Bobby V.:
How are you guys?  I'm so glad to be here with a couple of total losers and one pathetic excuse for a pitcher.  You fat lazy guys...

(All three stare down Bobby)

Bobby V.:
Ha,ha...just a joke.  Ya that's me...one funny guy.

Josh:
Well their is ONE good thing about being with the Dodgers.

Bobby:
Seriously Bobby V. how in hell did you get to be a manager in the first place?

Bobby V:
Oh..#$#$34 if I know. 

John:
Hey Josh we doing stomach slamming or what?

The three pitchers get up and take their shirts off.  They slam into each other's fat bellies watching blobs of fat wobble on stage.

Bobby:
I shouldn't do that on a counta my back and all.  I wonder if I lost a bunch of weight and didn't get smashed and smash into cars and get arrested.

Josh:
That's too much thinkin.

Bobby and John and Josh together:
DOUBLE FIST

(Bobby V just shakes his head)

Bobby V;
Losers...

John:
I don't know Bobby.  I'm being paid millions and you're getting fired so how are we losers?

Bobby V:
Hey its not my fault of all the injuries and the pathetic set of players I have in September...gee I hope that wasn't demoralizing to the players.

Josh:
I'm an idiot and even I can see you're an #$#$#$

Bobby and John and Josh together:


DOUBLE FIST

(Bobby V. grabs a beer.)
Oh what the #$#$34


Bobby and John and Josh and Bobby V.  together:
DOUBLE FIST

Bobby Jenks:
That's all today for the Jenks show and remember!!!

(everyone)
DOUBLE FIST