Chapter 1

Terry Francona is Mr. Obvious

Chapter 1

This was inspired by a rant by Arnie who essentially reminded everyone that a manager can only do so much to help a team. I took it from there. This is updated from the original post with new material and updated material. This was written during the beginning of the year when the Red Sox were getting crushed by every team including the Oakland A's.

-- Dave Fernandes

Terry woke up to the ringing of the phone in the hotel. He knew he was in a hotel because he looked around and it was a hotel. He looked at the clock. It said 6:00 am. Terry then knew it was 6:00 am because the clock said 6:00 am.

“Well, it is 6:00 am. That is why the phone is ringing. I must answer it because it is my wakeup call. I know it is my wakeup call because it is 6:00 am. If it was not 6:00 am it would not be my wakeup call. That is obvious.”

Terry picked up the receiver. He then put it down again.

“Now they know I woke up because if I didn't wake up it would keep ringing. That is obvious.”

Terry then yawned and stretched.

“I will take a shower. That will require soap, shampoo and a towel. I will use the towel to dry off so it won't get wet when I take a shower. That is obvious.”

Terry got up and tossed his clothes on the ground and walked into the shower. He turned the water on.

“If I turn it too far...it will be very hot...like it is now...slowly burning my skin turning it bright red, I will turn it cooler. That is much better and less painful.”

Terry washed with soap and then applied some shampoo to his hair.

“I don't need much since I am bald. Why do we use soap for our skin but shampoo for our hair. That is not so obvious so I cannot answer that question.”

Terry shut off the water and wiped himself off with the towel.

“Now it is wet but my body is dry. The towel absorbed the water and will be wet until it dries. That is obvious. “

Terry put on his clothes.

“I have to wear the travel uniform because we are on the road. If was at home I would not be doing that. This uniform is the same one the 1986 Red Sox wore when they lost that World Series. That is not inspiring. Theo Epstein thought it up. That is not a good sign because he has given this team players such as Eric Gagne and Brad Penny. I do not feel good now. That is obvious.”

Terry walked out the door and down the stairs to the hotel lobby. It was filled with people.

“Not many people know me because I am in Oakland California. If I was in Boston they would know me and since we have lost so many games lately that is a good thing and that is why they do not know me here. That is obvious.”

Terry hailed a cab. The cab stopped to let him inside the cab. Terry stepped inside the cab.

“Thank you. Please bring me to the Oakland ball park. I would go to Fenway Park…”

“I got it, “snapped the cab driver. Terry heard the phone ring. Terry answered a phone call.

“Hey, it's me John Lester. I have an injury and I can't pitch today.”

Terry sighed and said, “you called me to tell me that because you are pitching today. If you were not pitching today you would have said so in your conversation so that means...”

Just then the phone went dead.

“They always hang up on me because they think I am annoying. That is obvious.”

The cab stopped and Terry got out. He walked to the side of the cab and paid the driver.

“That'll be $7.50”

Terry handed him a ten.

“I would pay you seven dollars and fifty cents, but you are a cab driver and demand a tip even though I probably won't be using you again and you smoke and it makes the cab smell bad and you were rude to me. However I must pay you this...”

“Forget it...” snapped the cab driver who bulleted off without collecting his fee.

Terry smiled and said, “he left because I was annoying him and that is obvious and now I keep my $7.50. That is good.”

Terry sighed. He looked around a saw some raging fans with baseball bats heading towards him. He looked at them. They were angry and he knew that because they were carrying baseball bats.

“Ah...they must be Red Sox fans. I will run away before they kill me. “

Terry bulleted towards the gate feeling the hard objects thrown at him. He ran inside and locked the door. He took a breath.

“Ah...a player who...performs...horribly is loved and yet the manager is hated and is payed so little for doing so much. That is obvious.”