Julio Lugo is Mr. Mistake

Chapter 1 – Denial.

"If you follow the Red Sox blogs, you know my sad feelings toward Julio Lugo. However I decided to have some fun with it...so here is Julio Lugo in action."

“Hi everyone...welcome to the home stand with Julio Lugo once again back at short. It's going to be an exciting game with Dice-K making his Fenway start, the first after his DL stint.”

Top of the first

"Ground ball to shortstop, Lugo grabs it and throw it into right field...and now he's running to right field to recover it! He slams into J.D. Drew. Drew looks in pain. Lugo throws to...left field? Now he's recovering it...and now Ellsbury is screaming in center field after Lugo ran into him. This guys a maniac."
"I agree but the Red Sox keep sticking with him so there must be something good...and now Jason Bay is crying out in left field as Lugo keeps throwing the ball all over the park. That's good for a run. "

Bottom Of the First

“Julio Lugo leading off. He swings at the wild pitch for strike one. That was different. Ball two but Lugo swings at it anyway for strike 2. This one was thrown to the audience...but no worries...Lugo swings at it for strike 3. Too bad there were runners on base.”

Top of the second

“Runner on first and a ground ball to shortstop. Lugo grabs it and throws the glove instead and that allows runners on first and second. Lugo appears to be having problems finding the ball. It's at his feet. Dice-K seems to be talking to himself on the mound. “

Top of the Third

“There's a line drive to short...that goes over Lugo's head and into left field. Bay fields it. Apparently Lugo had a broken shoelace. Dice-K appears to be drinking some beer on the mound. Lugo's still trying to lace up his shoe. Wow...those fans are looking kinda scary.“

Bottom of the Fourth

“Here's Lugo to bat. Can't wait for this one. They underarm a ball to him...and he swings at at as the ball drops in front of him. Lugo then runs to first thinking he got a hit! Wow...how much is this guy making?

Top of the Fifth

“Chopper to Lowell...Lugo falls over Lowell and now Lowell is out of the game. Lugo is having one tough game for himself and now Dice-K seems to be sharpening a rather long knife. Lugo's still got one more year on his contract...but I understand David Ortiz said to us beforehand that accidents do happen when you combine an automobile and a bazooka...whatever that means.“

Top of the Sixth

“Red Sox now with nine errors...all credited to Julio Lugo. A grounder to second. Kevin Youkilis knocks Lugo to the ground and it looks like Youk now has a twisted ankle. Looks like Kevin purposely tried to kill him and yet Lugo just keeps on going. This guy has a lot of luck...and the fans appear hungry for blood.”

Bottom of the Sixth

“Bases loaded, two outs and Julio Lugo goes to bat. Lugo swings and the bat flies to third base...and that's it for David Ortiz with what looks like two broken ribs...man Lugo is having a night for himself.”

Top of the Seventh

“How Terry Francona keeps Lugo in the game is beyond reason. Ortiz out from Lugo's bat. Youk out, Drew out, Ellsbury out but...here's a ground ball to Lugo...and he fields it! He fields it...and then trips and falls on top of Pedroia...and now Pedroia's out. Dice-K seems to be throwing his glove at the ground and now he's tearing his uniform off. They may have to restrain him but Lugo's all right. “

Top of the Eight

“Terry is running out of players after Beckett took a swing at Lugo and Lugo ducked. Too bad about Beckett's broken wrist. There's a pop fly to Lugo. Lugo is under it and lets the ball hit him on the head. And he gets a big round of applause from the crowd. That really woke the fans up. Nobody is out there to check in on him...no trainer or anything. Sort of just leaving him there. Here comes Nick Green taking over at short. He gets a standing ovation and everyone is tipping their hat at him. Fenway fans really felt good there. Green is sort of just moving Lugo...wait...they're digging a hole for him...and the entire Red Sox team is joining in...and listen to this crowd as shovels are being handed out...but wait Lugo is waking up. He's OK folks. Lugo is OK. I've never seen such a empty feeling in the stands and now Okijima seems to be walking around in a circle talking to himself and the New York Yankees...wow are they cheering. They really like Lugo!“

Top of the nineth

“A ground ball to short...again and Lugo fields the ball and lets it go through his legs. He runs after it as the rest of the defense just leaves the field. Lugo grabs the ball and tries to throw it to someone...but there's nobody there on the field. Man...bad night for Lugo as the Yankees call the game at 329 – 0 with all Yankee runs entirely the fault of Lugo and here come the crowds from the stands...it really looks like this is it for Lugo...is that a bazooka?”