Thursday, May 28, 2009

Nightmare Series 8 – Nick Green

"The story contains actual and accurate portrayals of the figures in question (minus Nick Green) to the best of my ability. I've studied these figures for a long time and was hungry to write this one."


If there was one thing to be said about Nick Green was that he was trying and yet despite it all, Julio Lugo got more starts and got a lot more attention. In a way he couldn't blame Tito, Green had made his share of errors himself, but what was Lugo doing to earn that right?

He looked around him. It was an old western town filled with desert on either side of it. It felt like out of a movie and outside of two voices he heard from the bar, the town was completely empty. He walked forward towards the bar trying to ascertain the situation. When he moved past the doorway, he saw two people playing cards at the table. They were clearly from a different time.

“That was a three of clubs you pompous back stabber, “snapped the wry man with the round face and silver white hair waring a simple black outfit. “Every single time I play cards with you...”

“Really John, your eyesight works as well as your temper. It was clearly a five of hearts or is this the time to kick your wig around the room and scream!”

“Tom, you lie as well as you manage your finances and run your University!”

The anger that filled the man the man called Tom simmered but then quelled as Tom placed that questionable card on the table.

There...I told you, “cursed the man named John!

“I swear to you John that the card you are starring at is a five of hearts. Your eyesight...”

“It is a three of clubs, “interjected Nick Green who not only invited a stare from both of them but sent the man named John into a proverbial fit of euphoria.

There...for once in my life...Mr. Backstabber...”

“Don't say it, “snapped the man named Tom. Tom himself looked regal with an elaborate outfit and auburn red hair. He was tall and obviously wealthy and carried pride within his heart.

Stop it, “snapped Nick.

The two put their cards down and starred at the figure walking in the room. Nick sat down beside them.

“Where am I?”

“I have no idea, “said the man named Tom.

“Ha, “laughed the man named John, “finally I get my due...oh by the way, the name's John Adams!”

Nick nodded and then said with elation and pride, 'that's nice. Who are you?”

The man chucked and said, “Thomas Jefferson!”

Thomas got up and shook Nick's hand. Adams, unknown to Nick was rolling his eyes and pulling his hair out of his head.

“Calm down John, “said Thomas. “Clearly the man has taste!”

John grabbed the first chair he could get at and threw it across the room.

“Oh John, showing your more primitive side!”

Adams came back ready to slam his fist into Jefferson's face and said “, I sacrificed myself and my party...”

“The Federalists...I think it was...another note in history!”

John held his tongue and gave a bitter smile and said, “yes...my backstabber. The Federalists...and I made peace with Paris, while you...Mr. Vice President...did everything you could to cut my throat and ensure my downfall. “

Thomas sighed and said, “the Alien and Sedition act did that for you...John!”

'Oh you're a great finger pointer John but you're a liar!

“I..., “said Thomas grabbing some tea, “have no idea what sort of manifestations and lies you have created all to impress this fine young gentle...what is your name?”

Nick felt beaming pride and elation and said, “Nick Green sir!”

“Yes, “said Thomas...”Nick Green.”

Thomas then turned again and said, “oh...I see he plays for Boston...ah...he is a baseball player...part of that ruff and obtuse crowd that Boston bears such pride in!”

The laugh from Jefferson faded Nick's smile and mood.

“We have baseball and no slavery...while Virginia, as I predicted, bore the pride of defending slavery and separating itself from the union in 1861, ending in 1865, one hundred years later as I predicted!”

John Adams then laughed and fell back down on his seat.

Ignore my learned fellow Mr. Green. His charges and accusations are of no consequence. I did not have slaves!”

John slammed the table and said, “oh...now that slavery in America is illegal. I'm sure Sally Hemming would be proud of that one!”

It was the first time that Jefferson boiled with anger and threw the cards away.

Do you two always fight like this?”

Jefferson chuckled and said with a vicious twist of the tongue, “the man knows his history all too well.”

Adams snapped his tongue and said, “well...my learned scholar who wrote the Declaration Of Independence...”

Adams then paused and said, “and nothing else!”

Adams them leaned back and said, “who didn't attend the Constitutional Convention because he was too busy burning through his finances in France, flirting with women before heading back to America to take down my administration instead of WORKING with me. Why did you do it? For your own gain while working with France to encourage the French Revolution...you must have really liked the guillotine. Obviously, cutting off people's heads is your specialty!”

Enough, “snapped Jefferson. “You're no saint, driving your kids from you...”

How dare you, “snapped Adams.

And I would hardly call you a diplomat standing in the shadow of Franklin...”

Who spoke horrible French and screwed every woman in France!”

And let's not forget the Alien and Sedition acts...”

Adams gripped his fists in tight order.

You brought down Washington with your endless backstabbing ways calling him an old dolt and fool simply because you didn't like his policies. Rather than confront the man...you broke him! Anyone you disagree with...you cut their throats because you don't have the courage to confront them!”

Jefferson threw the table over and grabbed his gun aiming it at Adams.

It's OK Jefferson...I'm already DEAD!

Nick grabbed the gun and tossed it away.

Enough...from both of you! Were you always like this?”

Adams turned towards Jefferson and smiled. Thomas returned the smile and sat down again grabbing another deck of cards.

Forget us Mr. Green...please sit down and tell us your problem,” said Adams.

Nick sighed and sat down. He said, “Julio Lugo, “ as Jefferson and John traded cards.

I have seen the man in action, “said John wincing when he said the term action.

John, “said Thomas. “I had no idea you served yourself a dish of common garbage, otherwise known as baseball!”

Hey, “snapped Nick. “Come on...why are you so insulting Mr. Jefferson. You're my hero you know! I don't believe the science. I know you didn't have an affair with Sally Hemming.”

John hit his head against the table and said, “the education system of America once again shines.”

Indeed, “smiled Thomas. “Face it John a hundred books could be read of your exploits and yet I will stand out on top!”

John raised his face and said, “oh like when you were governor of Virginia and let Benedict Arnold burn your home to the ground...great security measures Thomas!”

Thomas smiled and said, “that never happened and Mr. Green is right...I didn't have slaves!”

I am the one who didn't have slaves! I paid my workers driving my farming business to the ground in the process because I cared about worker rights...you on the other hand thought making nails was a good business for slaves. I suppose you liked to nail them to crosses!

Jefferson became livid with anger!

I fought to free them, Madison and I fought to free them...what did you do!”

Adams threw the cards at Jefferson's face and said, “I am done with you. All you do is deny everything while backstabbing everyone in the back. I never should have reconciled with you. It was my biggest blunder in history! I leave you with one thing – X,Y,Z
John stormed out of the room.

In the distance Nick Green heard the scream say, “I suppose you don't know about that one either Jefferson!”

Thomas chuckled and said, “The X,Y,Z affair which lead to Adams creating the Alien and Sedition Act. Ah. I like history Mr. Green, especially when the minor figures have left the room!”

The X,Y,Z affair was simply the proof that Adams showed congress that he had indeed sent three diplomats to France to make peace. Adams felt that the names should not be revealed and called them X,Y, and Z. This brought down the charge that Adams was NOT trying to make peace but war with France which is what his party wanted.

Nick leaned back and said, “you're not like what I pictured!”

Thomas said, “did you read any biography about me?”

No?”

Good, “smiled Thomas, “because they are all lies...minus the Declaration part and of course the Louisiana Purchase...not that I violated my own principles in getting that land...because I didn't...mostly...but the point is my friend, that when you look at those times, you must look first at myself, then Franklin and you will know what happened!”

Nick sighed and looked at the cards.

You cheated. There are only four aces in a deck!”

Jefferson looked at the seven aces and said, “not true.”

Nick leaned up and said, 'you're like Julio Lugo...you won't admit anything about your actions. How can you live like that!”

I'm dead idiot!”

Nick got up and said, “I don't blame Adams...you are a jerk!”

Thomas laughed as Nick stormed out of the room. He stood in the open street and saw the rotund figure resting against the chair.

A life such as yourself is not an easy one, “said Adams. “I have no easy answers for you...just do your best and hope that history remembers you.”

Nick leaned back and said, 'history isn't fair. The winners write it.”

Jefferson was a great writer, I'll give him that...and at one time my friend. Of course being a great writer made him loved by everyone. Everyone loves fiction and a good tale. The honest ones are relegated to the footnotes.“

Adams dusted his pants and said, “Oh well, Abigail should have dinner for me now. I'm eating with my children.”

Adams turned into the bar and screamed, “my son, also a great President!”

Who?” came the voice from inside the bar.

Adams got up ignoring the comment and said, “join me. Perhaps a dinner with Abigail and my children will quell that inner demon of anger!”

Nick got up and said, “sounds like a plan...now tell me how to beat Lugo!”

Adams laughed and said, 'those who know how to work the press will always win my friend...but it is the true talent that defines our destiny.”

Nick paused as Adams laughed and said, “face it my friend...we are two people destined for oblivion. Jefferson spoke and Franklin was made from the dust and between the two, the Revolution was born. Oh I hate history!”

Nick laughed.

“So what was your life like?”

“Mine, “chuckled Adams. “I'm a poor farmer and a lawyer. Did you know I helped defend two British soldiers from execution during the so-called 'Boston Massacre'?

“No, “ said Nick.

“The so-called massacre was simply an action out of control. England wanted to calm down the anger in the colonies but it reached a head in Boston. Soldiers were sent in to calm Boston's rebellion down. A mob approached the soldiers and things got out of hand. They were kids, young and inexperienced. If anything it should have been called the Boston Mob!”

Adams grabbed some water from a small bottle he carried with him.

“From there I worked my way into the Continental Congress where I argued – successfully for succession from England and gave Jefferson the task to write the document – the man was always in the right place at the right time. “

Adams paused. He seemed somber now.

“Then I became a diplomat to France to which I was ill equipped for. I did get money from the Dutch while Jefferson spent all his money away. Franklin...the bastard did accomplish what we needed – the French loved him and his sickening charm. “

Adams leaned down looking at the dust.

“Then I became Vice President where I alienated congress so much that they created a Vice President who couldn't argue with congress which is why your Vice President today has little to do. Then I became President enduring the plague of Thomas Jefferson who would not give up until he became President...but it's a long story my friend. Jefferson drove me out of office. He was his own News Channel smearing everyone and everything he didn't like. I died on the farm, alone and forgotten. I suppose they'll remember me for the letters I wrote Jefferson!”

John chuckled.

“Oh Mr. Green, you have more fame than I will ever have in my lifetime.”

“They didn't make a movie about me...Mr. Adams.”

Adams laughed and said, “I did like that movie...even though I looked so ugly on screen. I always felt Tom Cruise should have played me, “chuckled Adams.

John got up waving to Nick.

“Oh my boy, let's head out to Abigail. I'm hungry and while I cannot solve your problems...I can at least get your mind off of them. “

The two walked off in the distance as Nick would spend the evening eating with John and Abigail. Nick wouldn't wake up from the nightmare till the next morning. Apparently nobody noticed he was asleep.


1 comment:

  1. Humor mixes with early American history. I am loving it. Let me try to annotate the historical events to make this humor more interesting and informative.
    As background, John Adams (Jefferson was his vice president) was the second president of the US. and Thomas Jefferson the third president. Both Adams and Jefferson served under George Washington as vice president and secretary of state respectively.
    Jefferson was the Governor of Virginia and the founder of University of Virginia.
    Adams accused Jefferson of backstabbing relates in part to the Alien and Sedition Acts which were signed into law by John Adams during the undeclared naval war with France, later known as Quasi War. The Democratic-Republicans led by Jefferson attacked them as being both unconstitutional and designed to stifle criticism of Adams Administration.
    Burning finances and flirting in France refers to Jefferson’s lavish life style in Paris when he served as Minister to France which ostensibly prevented him from attending the Philadelphia Convention and Jefferson illicit affair with the slave Sally Fleming.
    Adams represented the British soldiers in the Boston Massacre trial. Six were acquitted and two were convicted of manslaughter from the original charge of murder.
    With that historical note in mind, re-read the humor and it is hilarious.

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